15 January 2011

2011 look back to 1997 onset tinnitus

...

2011

Looking back.

Pretty pissed off, really.

Fourteen years of mosquito whine inside my head. Now, news of a pill.

A pill to rebalance my brain. Back to a beneficial balance of brain activity. One not including tinnitus. My friend wakes up bleary one morning:

"Hey. Not sure if this is something, but how do I make a translation?"

 Kitchen. Back to the table.

>>> maxiscience French article micropondre

>>> English Nature article microponder

"Not sure," I tell him.

Sit, start searching.

Scared.

...

I think I am going mad

...

1997

Scratchy. An orange and brown polyester couch, scruff, rough. Solid. I curl into its warmth. Unbidden, my mind announces:

"I think I am going mad."

Quite distinctly.

...

tinnitus and stockholm syndrome

...

Leaning.
Stove top
Elbows locked

14 years
melt underway
ear alert, mosquito-like

24.7
waking hour
resting moment

whine
tinnitus whine
never ending mosquito whine

and now
promise of a pill
cancelling years of pull
from aural
evil.

. ..